Maybe This Will Help…

You know, I write poems and I post stuff here, but I don’t think it’s doing any good. I feel better when I post something but only for a few minutes. It never lasts to the next day – no one cares about my poems. No one cares about anything. I’ve not had a comment in months. How is this supposed to help if no one is reading what I write, and no one responds or has anything to say.

I went to this poetry reading tonight and I read my poem from last week, and no one really even clapped. They rarely do. Maybe I suck. Maybe they are struck by what I said. Probably not. I certainly don’t care for most of their poems…pretentious crap. So what can I expect? Nothing, I guess.

I don’t know. Maybe I’ll stop. Try something else.

If you’re out there, let me know. say something. Please.

Hey.

I haven’t felt like posting here in quite a while – I’ve been watching lots of movies and just sitting around – but recently I got out and took some pictures of the city and wrote a couple more poems. I decided I’d get out the video camera and upload the rest of the footage I shot for the video diary and see what I had. I guess I’ll post it soon.

I found this open mic poetry reading near by – I might try bringing my notebook down there and seeing if I feel like reading something. Not sure. We’ll see…

Okay, let’s try this again…

Got a new camera, again. The one I talk about in this episode got stolen, as I mentioned in the notes for the last entry. Guess I’ve had bad luck with cameras.

Anyway, in this entry I talked about the old camera getting ruined, and the day I proposed to you.

I’ll try to be better about posting. It’s tough to stick with anything these days…

Sorry to be so inconsistent, it’s just hard to do this. It’s probably good for me though…

So my camera got stolen, but i found this bit of footage from us playing fetch with Harley in the back yard at your old place. She sure likes playing fetch.

Now she just wants to lay in the chair. It’s like she’s listening for you to come home…

Well, it’s been a little while. I haven’t felt like posting anything.

Anyway, I recorded this the day I bought you the tickets to the Kentucky Derby. I still have them…

When I started editing what I had recorded I realized I say “Um” a lot. I thought it might be funny to edit together a gag reel for the end of your present. This is as far as I got…

I recorded this entry when you were up in Oregon for work last summer.

Looking back now I wish I had gone with you. Every minute away from you was a waste of time.

I remember this day. I was so happy to be getting published in something other than the magazine.

You were so happy for me too. Thank you for all your inspiration. I miss you.

Here is the first installment of my video diary for my fiancé Anabella.